Monday, December 13, 2010

5 Things I've Learnt to Love about Denmark

Since starting this blog, a few things have come to my attention. People don't like me on Digg, friends find my posts annoying, podcasts aren't that interesting and apparently people from Denmark like my blog. I don't have any clue why, I don't think there is anything particularly Danish or Denmark orientated in regards to my blog but I thought I'd share what little I know about the country and his exports...other than these.
It's like Mocha, but in teeny tiny love-filled bits.
  1. My childhood music was filled with Danes
    For some reason I feel like everytime I use the term Danes, it's like some form of obscure racial slur. Anyway, when I was growing up in the 90's I had only a few loves when it came to music and very few of them have transferred in the current form of my body. Something everyone probably went through was a phase of loving this band.

    Yes, doesn't matter how many times I want to check a colour that is only a slightly bit dark blue but not entirely light green, I still get this image of this band from a small town in Denmark called Copenhagen. This poppy group invaded every bit of my ear drum with their catchy lyrics and simple electronica melodies. The band is still performing and touring to this day and their last album came out over a decade ago following a small split, but apparently they have an album planned for next year. Oh and if you're a fan of Metal/Hard Rock and people who hate the internet, this man is a Dane as well.
    Invisible Cocks
    But for now enjoy the soothing sounds of 90's pop slowly dying on it's feet.

    20 million  views, people!
  2. Apparently your women are pretty hot
    Whilst I have never been to Europe but plan, like a snail plans to get to a leaf on a tree, a lot of travelling blogs and websites claim your women are incredibly attractive.
    Imma coming, bitches!
    My travels to Japan and Korea and being in my teens, my eyes weren't always directly placed on the dazzling scenery or culture, but I never saw anyone that caught my eye. But how hot can your women actually be?

    Holy shit. I gotta get into Soccer.
  3. Speaking of hot women...I mean, advertising
    You guys get away with too much I mean look at this ad for underwear in your country

    Do you know what would happen in our country if that happened? Our economy would be plunged into darkness from people buying Australian flags made in China and the ratings for shows like Today/Tonight and A Current Affair would go through the roof. I mean, how much can you really do with advertising?

    I do not want to fuck with your marketing team, ever.
  4. You gave us Lars Von Trier
    Being a pretentious hipster, I've found that cinema, especially from Australia and the US pales in comparison to directors from other countries. People like Edgar Wright, Gaspar Noe, Michel Gondry and Alfonso Cuaron all have their place closer to my heart than Michael Bay ever would.

    But then comes along the Dogme Movement of 1995. Started by Von Trier and essentially brings the heart of cinema and the hope of creation with most art, to be reality (or a creation of reality). Von Trier has constantly surprised his audiences again and again with works such as The Idiots, The Five Obstructions and most recently, Anti-Christ. His films portray a sense of the human psyche as something which will consistently try and eventually triumph, in it's own way, as if the mind is greater than the body. With Von Trier, independent cinema would never be the same, although to be fair, the man did cheat on his own rules.
    It's okay, I forgive you...don't eat my soul.

    Whilst some of the origins of Vikings cannot really be traced back (translation: I couldn't personally find it on the interwebs), one of the most hardcore of all Vikings was known as Cnut the Great.
    Not only an anagram for a dirty word, the name Cnut is infamous around Denmark and England for being the king of both. His reign over both countries lasted for over decade and was infamous for his relations with the churchs of both countries and his marriage to Ælfgifu of Northampton and Emma of Normandy.
    Total Pimp
    Of course, whilst in recent years the name of Vikings have been softened, the awesomeness still lives on in the people.

    So awesome.

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